Dark Moon

moon4closerquote

“For he will command his angels concerning you  to guard you in all your ways.” Psalm 91:11 ESV

For quite sometime, the inspiration and the will to write was taken away from me. I say taken away because I don’t write for fun, fame or money. I write when an inspiration hit me. Most times, it will wake me up in the middle of the night or the early hours of the morning. When that voice overwhelms me with thoughts, I had to write. That lull in writing, some writers call it writers block, I call it worlds block. I was lost. I wander around. I’m present physically, but I was not there. You know what I am saying?

I’ll be very honest with you here, I am trying so hard to stay away from religious post. You know why? After publishing my book, that feeling of being questioned about my knowledge and ability to write as much as to how much I know about religion follows me around. Have you ever had that feeling? It’s just there. This and other more personal – “I need to find myself stuff”, you know what I’m saying?

In this time of invisibility and wandering and questioning….He let me be.

I mean…He did give me time off. No more middle of the night or early morning wake up calls. Nothing! Am I okay with that? Of course I was.

But you know, He has other plans. I don’t know then….but I know now.

I found out that He will distance himself from us when need be. He will let us do things our way. See things our way. Find things our way.

I learned that true, He will distance Himself, but….He won’t abandon us. He’s there on the sidelines….from the people who crossed our path again, to the people that we just met for the first time and to everything else that happened either planned or by coincidence…

He knows. He sees. He let it be. All for a reason.

All this happened, so we can get to know ourselves better. So that we may truly grasp the true meaning of understanding. So that we may realize that forgiveness is not just about saying I’m sorry and I forgive you. So that we see what genuine humility looks like. So that we may experience what love (without being love back) really looks like….you know one that is pure, genuine, kind, understanding, humble and forgiving.

I learned that we can try to take away God from our life…but…

God won’t let you…He just won’t!

And like the great, forgiving and loving Father that He always is…..

He is ever ready to pick up the pieces, mold it back together….

This time….sturdier, stronger, wiser….much much better.

And then….

the New Moon arises.

“And now, dear lady, I am not writing you a new command but one we have had from the beginning. I ask that we love one another. And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” 2 John 5:6

All good things,
Charina

{Picture Perfect}

sunset

If you think you’ve seen this picture before, you are probably right. I posted this photo in my photography blog at Life Seeing Lenses. If you want a more easy-going blog, head on over there and join me in my adventure.

Picture perfect. Don’t you think, this makes for a perfect picture? I am not talking about my skills here as a photographer but rather at how amazingly perfect this sunset was. Everything that we need to live a happy life is represented in this picture. At least I believe so. Have you noticed the heart shape tree? No, it’s not photo shopped.

Picture perfect life accompanied with a picture perfect plans. Is there such a thing? Where everything goes according to our plan. Where everything is smooth sailing. Where we have everything under control. You know, I got this…

I don’t know, but I do know of a picture perfect front. Where everything is smooth sailing, where everything is A-Okay. The I got this front…

Picture perfect lies. I know at some point in our life, we all have those picture perfect lies. Lies to make everything looks good and happy and perfect…because society envies a picture perfect life even if it’s all picture perfect lies.

Picture perfect friendship. This one hits hard. I don’t have too many close friends. I am talking about someone where I can tell everything….except for one. I am talking about a soul friend as oppose to a soulmate…maybe it’s the same. But you get my point? But like all the other relationship, this picture perfect friendship….there’s no such thing…perhaps it’s one picture perfect…I truly don’t know….because I don’t believe in ending and growing apart. Picture perfect imperfections…?

Picture perfect reasons. In the end, we realized that everything we go through…it’s for picture perfect reasons. It is not to prove how good we are at putting up picture perfect front but rather to show our picture perfect self. Tougher, stronger and wiser. There is no mistake only lessons. There should be no regret only experience. There is no failure only triumph. There is no suffering only blessings. There is no pain…only love.

Picture perfect mess. Yes, I can be a picture perfect mess but what’s so good about that…He still loves me just the same.

 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one” Romans 3:10 KJV

All good things,
Charina